What are holidays for?

There is much debate in the glearner household about where we should go on holiday this year. Both daughters have big exams this year so the plan was to take advantage of the early end to the school year to have a 'big' holiday. However, with daughter number 1 (DN1) off inter-railing and daughter number 2's (DN2) guitar exam our window of opportunity is squashed back into normal school holidays. Originally the plan was to go to visit family on the west coast of America, that was until I added up what this would cost. Rethinking it has taken us on mental journeys to Tunisia, Morocco and Turkey, but the conclusion is that this expense may not be worth it if the temperatures are so high that all attempts at cultural outings are thwarted. So, back to thinking about the States and Canada where the temperatures are more likely to be tolerable in late July.

This has got me thinking though, what are holidays for? Daughter number 2 does not like holidays, she does not deal well with the unfamiliar and does not like being outside of her comfort zone. That said, in our travels across Europe by car, she has enjoyed sight seeing and new experiences. Daughter number 1 is hungry for new experiences. She is up for riding a camel in the desert in 40 degree temperatures and thinks that the caution from other members of the family (me and her sister), is unfounded. The other reason I went off the idea of Morocco is that, having talked to friends, I could not face the debate that would be had with DN1 about her skimpy dress which is likely to attract the wrong sort of attention in that country. Husband has perpetuated the myth that I hate travelling, in contrast to his thirst for it. Of course that is not the truth, but, I am more aware of risk, like to think things through and have plans. Want to avoid the chance of being robbed (it has happened) rather than lay myself open to it.

Mont Blanc glacier, seen on the way back from Italy

So holidays? For me they are about seeing new places, better understanding different societies and people, enjoying the history, arts and culture of a new place, enjoying the geography and landscape. Beach holidays are really not us. I can see however that this mental model of holidays creates tremendous pressure to 'get the most from' a trip. To plan the sites that might be seen and to work out routes and schedules. If this fails, for example last year when a combination of heat and, what turned out to be, pancreatitis, meant that our trip to Italy was an impressionistic, whistlestop, tour of places on route, then it is disappointing. To have gone all the way through a new landscape and not imbibed its essence becomes a source of regret, albeit mild. I am not completely uptight about this, but I guess the desire to get the most from a holiday goes deep into my childhood roots, when we always went around the sites. With hindsight I can see that visiting old churches, as we so often did, and as I still do today, was probably born out of trying to find something historic and vaguely interesting that was free.

These days, one of the first things I do is look at web reviews of places, recommendations for places to visit and stay. In many ways this adds to the pressure. Once upon a time the most advice you could get was a printed guide (if you were lucky). I recall the halcyon days of the Rough Guide, a revelation of advice about places that would not be in more formal guides. In those days you had to just strike out, perhaps having booked one or two places ahead. Husband and I went to Peru and Bolivia like that. Just our first night in Lima booked and the rest of our accommodation found as we went. It was a great holiday. On reflection, it is the desire to protect my children, to make sure that I am not taking them into dangerous situations or leaving them without a place to eat and sleep, coupled with the ability to use the internet to plan a blow by blow itinerary, that has influenced my approach to holidays in the past 18 years. Perhaps now they are big enough to get on a train and travel across Europe on their own (even if I am fretting at home),  is it time for me to rediscover a more serendipitous approach to holidays?